What the voice inside your head says about you Risk and reward Trying to make a move on a friend is a balance of risk and reward, and men, more often than women, are attracted to opposite-sex friendseven when both people define the relationship as platonic. Men overestimated how attractive they were to the women, and the women underestimated how attracted the men were to them In one study, men and women were asked to rate how attracted they were to each other and how attracted they thought their counterpart was to them after a brief conversation. The men overestimated how attractive they were to the women and women underestimated how attracted the men were to them. People who rate themselves as highly attractive are also more likely to overperceive other's sexual interest in them. Perhaps the confidence of being attractive leads them to take risks, or they think they are more attractive than they really are, and so get rejected more often. Like when a person leans forward or laughs, or whatever — they view [that] as a sexual sign.
Why do some straight men have femininity with other men? Tony Silva argues that these men — many of whom enjoy hunting, fishing and assassination guns — are not closeted, bisexual or just experimenting. After interviewing 60 of these men over three years, Dr. Silva found that they benefit from a range of relationships with erstwhile men, from hookups to sexual friendships to secretive loving partnerships, all although strongly identifying with straight culture. We spoke with Dr. Silva about his book. Why do straight-identified men allow sex with other men? The adult year of the men I interviewed reported that they are primarily attracted en route for women, not men.
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