Vote For Sexy Student Council President: Veronka Swartz

“They say fear is a good motivator, I say Sex is the best motivator. They say absence makes the heart grow fonder, I say Sex makes the heart grow fonder,” jokes Veronika Swartz. “They say don't count your chickens before they hatch, I say Sex.” Of course she’s going to say something funny. The multi-talented bombshell is a comic, actor, Press Club 7 host and producer, burlesque dancer, pin-up, who is also working on a “bunch of other stuff.” That other stuff includes working on her website, booking and promoting, writing, performing in shows, making videos, making costumes and a fair bit of “kicking ass and taking names.”

Comedy is one of her main focuses, with December 6 being the one-year anniversary of her first stand up performance. “I hope comedy proposes!” In case it doesn’t, she’ll be celebrating with her monthly stand-up show Press Club 7. She’s also busy producing a show for the Festival of New Formats at Comedy Bar, with the concept being comics doing stand-up as celebrities. Veronika will be hosting as Lady Gaga, wearing only spaghetti and meatballs. “In stand-up we sometimes like to bring notes on the stage with point form jokes written on them,” admits Swartz. “It's basically a cheat sheet with the name of the joke and then the sub jokes. Mine looks like this:”

Deaf - Hearing, Marlee Matlin, Farts, Sex
Mom - Armpit, Vagina, Sex
Sex - Chicken, Desperation, Armpit, Sex

Soon she will have pin-up photos for sale on her website. Being overtly and publicly sexual does not seem to be an issue for her. “My sexuality, however, could inhibit me if I let other people take ownership of it,” Veronika reveals, confidently. “I have the body of a porn star and have zero issues showing it off.” She recently shot a softcore TV show for Zalman King, called Body Language. In it she is topless and featured making out with strippers. The footage ended up on the world’s largest celebrity porn site, Mr. Skin. “My friends responded, ‘Oh you must be so embarrassed.’ Are you kidding me? They think I am a celebrity!” In order to not feel any future embarrassment or suffer career issues because of it, she wrote a blog posting about the experience and took ownership of it.
“Now I don't have to worry that this could inhibit my career. My tits are already famous.”