Open and Connected: Samantha Fraser

“Sex is in almost my every thought. I'm all about pushing people to be their most honest and open selves and a healthy relationship with sex and sexuality is, I think, a big part of that,” espouses Toronto’s Samantha Fraser. “Even if people choose to not have sex, it's key to connect with themselves to discover that. Watching people go through this process as well as going through it myself is inspiring every day.”

Discovering connection and inspiration are key factors in her various projects. Through her blog Not Your Mother’s Playground, Samantha writes about open marriage and the lessons she learns from it, both personally and from the community. She is also a life/relationship coach who works with people on the subjects of non-monogamy and dating and relationships, as well as business and career goals and personal goals.

On top of these, Fraser is also writing her first book, Not Your Mother's Playground: Open Relationships For Everyday Folk hoping for a late summer first print run. That would be perfect timing to coincide with Playground, a sexuality mini-conference she is planning for November 2011. Kinda makes you wonder how she can handle one marriage, let alone other relationships while being so busy! “I'm terrible at putting work and projects as top priority if I have the opportunity for a wonderful sexual experience with a lover,” Fraser admits. “Being in an open marriage, it can be a logistical challenge sometimes to get time with different lovers, so I'll take the moments when I can, even if they mean I'm working late at night on projects as punishment!”

Samantha takes a different course when asked who her inspirations are. Usually people will answer with a few names of sexual pioneers and heroes. She has different criteria. “I find that most of the people I find inspiration in are those closest to me. Anyone that is open and honest about who they are, admits their faults, embraces their strengths and works to make life better, I find inspiring. There are countless examples of "famous" people I suppose that fit this bill but right now my lovers are the only people that I can think of!

Describing herself as someone who is very emotional, but also ruled by logic, her own sexual self lives in various parts of her. "As I told a lover recently, I wear my heart on my sleeve and my vagina in my eyes."